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Diaries of Someone Devastated – Poem

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A beautiful view of the sky in Tunisia

Tunisia, Sousse

It was yesterday ..

When I cried just before I saw you

As if  you heard me when I called you

To finally say goodbye to you

Before I'll lengthen that distance between us

I tasted  your  innocence and smile though for a while

And  for the very last time maybe in my entire life

Damn! How cruel  life is ! When  you must keep yourself from crying

Sincere tears  that drip bitterly for somebody worth lamenting his loss

These people are rare nowadays and you are one of them

So much that you  could extract that humanity and goodness in me

Thanks for giving me the opportunity to be as natural as I'm at home

Yesterday I was enjoying every single minute by your side

It is not everyday that I can see you and  we can talk , walk

I still don't know if you could see  that sadness on my face

You inspire me transparency, that something rare we always shared and share

I was the happiest, taking delight in a most tender company  of yours

You were warm, caring and unbelievable

Was it out of kindness or you still like me as I 'll always do myself ?

This question worries me  a lot but vainly  until I said to myself

Needless to think about someone you know you can no longer be with

I'll answer and say I know but we never know ..

Life is full of surprises, some happy and others shitty

Even though I am the saddest, I'll never be tired and sick  mourning your loss

As I went back home yesterday ...

I was hiding my tears during a two-hour trip

Under those black glasses there were bitter ones, sore,

When I started, I was choking,  as if  I could neither stop nor end

I was thinking that if I keep weeping my whole life,

Shedding tears of blood, I'll never make up for the void and  regret

You left me with as I lost a warmest, most affectionate and  sincere someone

In the underworld of morality murderers we are meant, and happen to exist and live  in

I don't think you know about what I felt and still feel but if I ever had the opportunity

To declare my love to you, I'll  dare and say "I LOVE YOU" like I've never dared in my life,

I am feeling the dire  need to reveal it

It tires  me just like some heavy burden I cannot get rid of,

Now, I 'll leave  you with a hopeless wish and a helpless dream,

But know that I am  shivering all over, writing these couples of letters under a summer day sun that has no beam,

And know that I know that you will neither read nor understand these words

But I'll write, write, and write and though I know again that for your love I have no right ..

For the  best and most cherished guy I've ever met.

Photos credit: Zied Nsir


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